ADHD Life-A bad day

This is an older post that I wrote on a bad day. At the time I had decided not to post it because…*what would people think?!* But if you have read my blog, then you know that I try to be honest…sometimes to a fault.

I am going to post this today because well, I cannot be the only mother who has ever felt this way at one time or another.  This is not a constant feeling, it was just a feeling in the moment. This does not make me a bad mom, it makes me a REAL mom. A real PERSON.

A Bad Day

As I sit at the dinner table all by myself, tears falling into my untouched plate of food, I wonder if anyone else has ever had a moment where they hate their child?

It sounds so awful. I cried just thinking it. But I have had moments, like right now, where I have hated my daughter.

Maybe it is not hate towards her, maybe it is hate towards the life that we live or the way that we have to behave or the uncontrollable screaming and name calling that is coming from the other room.

It only lasts a few minutes. I should be able to handle it. But when your child is calling you an awful mother, screaming it at you with such venom, saying they don’t want to live because you are so awful, over and over, it is hard to keep your composure.

When we have a good day, it is SO GOOD. When we have a bad day, it is SO BAD. Sometimes it only affects the time that the ‘BAD’ takes place but a lot of time it puts tension on the entire day and it is so hard to shake it off.

Patience mommies…patience. It will get better.

-3rd Generation Mommy

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This Week Has Been Wonderful <3

This past week has been a pretty great one for me.

First of all, I lost 5 pounds this past week, giving me a total of 11 pounds lost! This brings me to my new weight of 219 pounds.I must say that this feels pretty great. It is the first time I have been under 220 since my daughter was born 7.5 years ago. This just adds fuel to the fire of my Weight Loss Journey.

Second of all, I have officially shared my blog with 2 close friends. Up until this point I wanted to build the content of my blog before sharing with anyone. Who wants to read a blog with 1 post right? But I do want to be held accountable for my actions and my weight loss so I decided to share. I don’t plan on officially sharing it with anyone else just yet, but one day I hope to share it with a lot of people who need the inspiration to start their own Journey.

Third (last but not least) of all, I got my very first follower on my blog. Actually 2 of them! 2 followers for which I do not know personally! He he that sounds silly, but to me it is exciting 🙂

All-in-all this week has been a pretty great one that will only be getting better as over the weekend I will be celebrating my 27th birthday! YAY me! Parties, cakes and a few too many drinks will be had by all. Although, I think the most fun will be celebrating my nephews 1st birthday on Sunday. We are Birthday Buddies and I am so happy to share my birthday with such an amazing little man ❤ Best Birthday present ever!

About Me

Hello and thank you for visiting my blog!

My name? Mom, Mommy, Mama, or Ashley. I am also known as a; confidante, chaser of bad dreams, kisser of boo boos, meanie, rule maker, rule enforcer, daughter, mother, sister, best friend…..you catch my drift.

I am an outspoken, kind hearted, strong woman. I have an amazing group of family and friends. I love my life and I love myself.

I love myself. That is why I am starting this blog. This blog is about my journey to getting fit. The hitch? I am a BBW (Big Beautiful Woman for those of you who don’t know what BBW means). I have about 80-90 lbs. to loose and it is not going anywhere fast. I have decided to change my life. It is going to be a big change. It will take a lot of time and commitment, but I know that I AM WORTH IT!

I am writing this blog to speak to the things that most people think, but are afraid to say. Hell I am afraid to say them myself! Nonetheless, my goal is to say them anyways.

I am writing this blog for inspiration. To inspire myself and hopefully I will be able to inspire others in the process.

I am also writing this blog so that one day I can look back and say WOW! Look where you were only 30 days ago; 6 months ago, 2 years ago. Look at all you have accomplished. Look at all you have to be proud of.

Thank you for joining me on this amazing journey that they call life.

Don’t worry. This is just the BEGINNING!

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