Killing Those Calories

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Double Down: T25 Ab Intervals and T25 Cardio
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T 25 Cario

Do you think its enough to double your calories burned on two separate days to make up for missing 2 workouts? I dont know if it works that way, but I did it anyways lol

My Fitness Pal calculates your total calories burned over the course of the week and gives you a total deficit of calories burned vs. calories consumed.

Since I knew ahead of time that there would be two nights at the end of my week where I would not be able to work out I chose two days and doubled down on my workouts. I wanted to die by the end, but I struggled through. Plus Sunday I burned over 1.000 calories walking the zoo all day SO Im not feeling too bad about it.

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At the zoo with this crazy monkey. ❤
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Feeding a giraffe at the zoo.
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1 Week Down, 9 To Go!

wpid-20150519_214202.jpgWeek 1 is finished. On to week 2!

Thank goodness that first week is finished. It was killer after taking just over 2 weeks off in-between challenges. My advice: NEVER EVER take that much time off in between workouts and think you will be fine…you wont be. It felt like those workouts were the hardest workouts that I had ever done, and I had done pretty much all of them before in my last challenge.wpid-20150520_212316.png

Thankfully, I got through 4 of the 5 days of workouts. Yes that does mean that I skipped 2 of the 6 work outs that were required but you know what? That is OK. I am easing back into it. I definitely could not have completed all of the workouts. I had one day that I actually fell asleep before my 7-year-old while we were watching TV. I was in bed by 8 that night lol. I also had a very busy weekend. Life gets in the way, and that is OK.

This week I hope to be able to complete all of the workouts. I’m not making any promises, but for now I plan to do them all.

I am also still on track with my meals. Meal prep is the only way for me to be able to eat healthy and really watch what my calorie and carb intake. For now, my lunches consist of 1 salmon filet cooked on the barbecue in a foil packet, 8 asparagus spears, and about 3/4 cup of wild rice blend. I have 3 lunches made so twpid-20150519_120729.jpghat I can just throw it into my lunch pail the night before and its ready to go in the morning. For breakfasts I am still having greek yogurt and berries. If i’m really hungry I have a hard-boiled egg in there and 1/2 a cucumber cut up. I find that if I don’t pack my lunch or my snacks, I am starving and I go out to eat. Fridays I don’t usually bring a lunch though. That is my day to eat out. 😀

I will post some more of the workouts that I’ve been doing and how difficult or easy I am finding them as I go.

Thanks for reading 🙂

Back on the Band Wagon!

Ok, so I need to get pumped again. Ive been dragging my ass for the past 2 weeks and enough is enough.

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Monday Night Sweaty Selfie. T25 Cardio DONE!

Yesterday (Monday) was my first day of my new Beach Body Challenge.  It is a T25 specific challenge, but it is 10 weeks long and it features the entire program. I feel like I need these challenges to stay accountable. Without them, I just go off on my merry way and don’t force myself to work out. And right now, I literally have to force myself. I do not WANT to work out. It does not feel good or look good or make me feel all happy afterwards…no, it makes me kind of want to cry, or puke, or both. But guess what? I KNOW that I need to do this. I know that I will never get better, never loose this god forsaken weight unless I am giving it my all…and I am. I am now.

I am choosing (AGAIN) to do start this weight loss journey. Not that I ever actually stopped or gave up or anything, I just took a break that I shouldnt have. I figure, at least it wasnt a year long break like my last one, it was only 2 weeks. Next time, maybe it will only be 1 week, then no weeks.

This journey is for life. It is not a month, or wpid-20150519_082458.jpga year, or until I loose the amount of weight that I want to loose. It will become my way of life. It just takes time to form habits. Look how long I was eating like crap and not working out. It is going to take time to form this healthy lifestyle. Im not promising myself that I will EVER love to workout, or love eating fruit and yogurt for breakfast instead of eating a breakfast sandwhich from McDonalds….what I am promising myself is that it will be worth it.

Type 1- Part 1

Confession: I am a Type 1 Diabetic.

For those of you who do not know the different between Type 1 and Type 2 diabetes—and trust me most of you dont even if you think you do—Type 2 is the kind of diabetes that can be controlled with diet, excersize, sometimes medications are added if you cannot control your diet or excersize. Type 2 is USUALLY weight related or age related or a mix of both. Type 1 (the kind that I have been blessed with) is an auto-immune disease where my body decided one day to attack itself, specifically my pancreas, and shut down my ability to produce any insulin what-so-ever. Type 1 is not caused by being overweight, or from eating to much sugary foods. Type 1 and Type 2 are often confused as many people are not even aware that there are more than 1 type.

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A little background:

I was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes when I was 6 years old (I still cant believe that I have had diabetes for 21 years!). I was on multiple insulin injections every day, had to watch my diet carefully and was always sick in someway or another. On injections, I was in the hospital 1-2 times a month because of bad blood sugars.

When I was 15 I was given the chance to get an insulin pump. This was the best thing that could ever happen to me as it helped keep my blood sugars under control and I was never hospitalized for my diabetes again.The pump allowed me to live like a normal human being, but since I had always watched what I ate so closely and been so restricted before, I started gaining a lot of weight being able to eat whatever I wanted.

I was young and stupid and am paying the price for those binge sessions now. But imagine going from eating whatever a 6 year old eats (loving candy and chocolate etc) to being restricted. Literally not being able to eat any of those things for years after you already know what they taste like. You know what your missing and you are a kid who just wants to have a damn chocolate bar. Now imagine you go from really not being able to have any of those amazing tasting treats (yes sometimes I had a piece here and there shh..) to being told its fine if you eat them now….ugh DUH! I ate the shit out of that food. I ate everything that was restricted in my diet. That is where my weight struggles began.

I have definitely changed my eating habits now and am watching my diabetes so much more closely. I have been since my daughter was born 7 years ago (the birth of a child will do that to a person lol). I dont often binge and I eat food that is so much better for me, and makes me feel better too. Although I DO NOT deny myself the simple pleasures that food brings to my life, I enjoy those pleasures a little more carefully and with a little bit more moderation than I did when I was a teenager set free to eat what I wanted.

Sometimes though, I get people who make assumptions, or follow stereotypes about diabetes. Often someone (a laymen of sorts) talks to me about my diabetes and they make comments like ‘thats the bad kind right?’. I also get comments like ‘stop eating so much sweets then’ or ‘well once you loose the weight you will be fine’, when in reality this has nothing to do with my diabetes. Yes, my blood sugars will get BETTER as I loose weight but my diabetes will NEVER go away.

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No matter how healthy I eat, how much weight I lose, how active I am, my Type 1 Diabetes will never go away. Actually having Type 1 diabetes makes losing weight so much harder than those who do not have it.  The life saving insulin that I have to take everyday, all day, actually helps me to gain weight quite quickly and makes losing said weight nearly impossible. Isn’t that nice of it? lol

Anyways, I just wanted to shed some light on an issue that I deal with personally. This is Part 1, as I have so much information and did not want to make my post excruciatingly long 🙂 I am so thoughtful that way. Part 2 is mostly about the issues that I have while working out and eating with Type 1 Diabetes.

Thanks for reading. Don’t be afraid to comment below for any experiences you have had with stereo types or even some funny stories.

Goodbye To You

Today is the end of our 30 Day Beach Body Challenge. It makes me kind of sad, but really happy and excited at that same time. Sad because the Beach Body membership is pretty cool for when you get bored of the same video over and over. Happy and excited because I definitely purchased the right program for me and this just solidified that I am ready for this next chapter in my fitness and weight loss journey.

The real downside to today (in my eyes anyways lol) is the weigh in. Measurements, weights and after pictures. If youve been reading my blog you know how much I LOVE this part (NOT).

I weighed in and truthfully I am extremely discouraged. I haven’t lost a single pound in 3 weeks. Like literally have not fluctuated at all. I just want to scream WHAT THE FUCK! People say it’s not about the weight your loosing its about the change in your body but my clothes aren’t fitting any better either. The only positive difference I have noticed has been my energy level and mood. These changes are amazing but not all that I was looking for. I was not asking for much. I would have been happy with 1 or 2 pounds but nothing? Gawd! Ok I’m ranting now…Oops.

Measurements and pictures will come some time this week. When I’ve picked myself back up from this mild depression that I’ve found myself in and kicked my ass back into gear.

I am by no means giving up. I can picture the life that I want and I’m going to work until I get it. Sometimes you just need to have a little pity party along the way.

Current weight: 224

Never Giving Up

Wow. The last few days have been brutal. I have had no energy, no will power, no motivation at all.

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Being silly and sweaty after T25 Cardio on Thursday night
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Stacey being silly and sweaty after T 25 Cardio on Thursday night.

We worked out really hard Thursday and Friday. We decided to do T25 Speed 1.0 and Cardio. They are still really difficult for us, but we have definitely noticed improvements. We are able to work harder during the workouts and sweat a lot more. We still plan to work through the rest of the T25 Alpha videos but we will be focusing on the Speed and Cardio videos. We like these two videos the most.

My goal for focusing on Speed and Cardio is to make it through the entire video without taking a break. Currently I am huffing and puffing 5 minutes in. I usually make it about 10 minutes before I have to grab a sip of water or stand for a minute and take some deep breaths. So I want to eventually make it the entire video without MAXING OUT as they call it in Shaun T land :). Stacey’s goal is to make it the entire video without having to modify. I think that is an amazing goal! I wont get there myself with my arthritis (jumping hurts like a B*TCH) but she will definitely be able to accomplish this goal.


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SWEATY SEFLIE! Gave 110% during T25 Speed 1.0 Friday night.
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Sweaty Selfie! Literally dripping sweat from working it hard on T25 Speed 1.0 Friday night.

This past weekend I hadn’t felt myself and it was really starting to put a damper on things. I had a bad migraine (possibly due to no caffeine or the fact that my period may want to rear its ugly head) and a horrible stomach ache. So I had no motivation. The motivation that I did have, was spent on housework and meal prep for the week. I really didn’t feel like working out Sunday but I knew that I needed to. I suppose doing a half assed workout is better than sitting on said ass doing nothing right?

We did end up doing Speed 1.0 Sunday night after all. I know that I didn’t put my all into it like I have been but I think that’s OK. I still pushed play right? I worked out anyways. Sometimes that is all we can ask of ourselves.

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T25 Speed 1.0. Worked on our speed and stability Sunday night.

Putting on the Pounds

When I first began my fitness journey I told myself that I would be completely honest with myself and this blog. I told you that I was going to be completely honest as well. So I am here to tell you that I have gained 5 pounds back of my 11 pound weight loss.

This weight gain made me a little bit upset at first. How could I have gained 5 pounds in 1 week? Ive worked so hard, pushed myself during my work outs, even doing some workouts by myself. But, in all reality, it is my own fault. It was my birthday weekend. I let myself sit around and do nothing, eat junk, over indulge in drinks, cake, food in general, so I am paying the price.

Do I feel discouraged about gaining 5 pounds? Sure. Some of the weight is from over indulging, but some is from building muscle (or at least that’s what Im telling myself lol). Do I feel guilty that I had a lazy and crazy weekend? Absolutely not. I had so much fun with my family and my girlfriends last weekend that those 5 pounds were worth it. I need to be able to live my life and have fun doing it.

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Cant breathe after our T25 Cardio workout.

That being said, I am going to work my ass off this week!

We started back to our workouts full force last night, beginning with T25 Cardio. I dont know why but this cardio video is my absolute favourite of all the videos so far (and let me tell you, I hate cardio).

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Still managed to get a smile on our faces after working it hard.

We were on the ball last night. We worked it hard. We were breathing heavy (panthing even) to the point where we could barely speak, sweat was dripping, and our hearts were pounding. There were times that our muscles pretty much gave up (those damn squats Im tellin ya!) and Im not going to lie it was hard as hell, but there was not one moment where either of us stopped moving. I had determination to get this workout done and to work as hard as I could through the entire thing and I did.  I am so proud of how hard we worked, how hard I worked.

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Beat after T25 Cardio and lifting.

I was so determined yesterday that I was going to work out hard, that after the 25 minute Cardio I got out my weights and started lifting. I did a bunch of different excersizes to work out my arms as I have barely any muscle in that area. This wasnt necissarily an excersize for weight loss, but I also want to build muscle on this fitness journey and I feel that so far the videos have not helped me in the area of my upper body. Now I will tell you, I CANNOT lift very much. I had two weights weighing 3lbs each (yes only 3lbs each) and I could barely get through 3 reps of 10. Who am I kidding I could barely get through 1 rep of 10! But I lifted for another 25 minutes. I completed 3 reps of 10 for EACH muscle group in my arms/back/shoulders, which I thought was pretty good for the first time lifting :).

I cant wait to do this all again tonight. Maybe some Ab Intervals? Maybe some full body? We will see!

This Week Has Been Wonderful <3

This past week has been a pretty great one for me.

First of all, I lost 5 pounds this past week, giving me a total of 11 pounds lost! This brings me to my new weight of 219 pounds.I must say that this feels pretty great. It is the first time I have been under 220 since my daughter was born 7.5 years ago. This just adds fuel to the fire of my Weight Loss Journey.

Second of all, I have officially shared my blog with 2 close friends. Up until this point I wanted to build the content of my blog before sharing with anyone. Who wants to read a blog with 1 post right? But I do want to be held accountable for my actions and my weight loss so I decided to share. I don’t plan on officially sharing it with anyone else just yet, but one day I hope to share it with a lot of people who need the inspiration to start their own Journey.

Third (last but not least) of all, I got my very first follower on my blog. Actually 2 of them! 2 followers for which I do not know personally! He he that sounds silly, but to me it is exciting 🙂

All-in-all this week has been a pretty great one that will only be getting better as over the weekend I will be celebrating my 27th birthday! YAY me! Parties, cakes and a few too many drinks will be had by all. Although, I think the most fun will be celebrating my nephews 1st birthday on Sunday. We are Birthday Buddies and I am so happy to share my birthday with such an amazing little man ❤ Best Birthday present ever!

The Goals For My Future

I was asked a few simple questions today. A few simple questions that have made me realize that I have been lying to myself for a really long time. I was asked: What made you decide to loose weight now? Whats different from the last time you tried to loose weight? What are your goals and when do you think you will achieve them?

2 years ago, I got it into my head that I was going to loose 100 pounds in a year. Easy enough right? I was working out, mainly speed walking at the gym, when I started getting horrible pain in my feet. I later found out that I have arthritis, in my feet and knee, at the ripe old age of 25 (at the time). I also got a really horrible tissue infection in my right leg that left me down for the count for about 6 weeks. These were all really good excuses as to why I quit.

In all reality, I was scared shit-less. Scared of the pain in my feet and scared of infection returning to my leg. I never told anyone that until a few months ago. I think actually telling someone my fear is what really helped me decide that it was time to try again. Hearing myself say out loud “I am afraid” brought me to reality.

So I begin again.

My weight loss Journey.

Why now?

I am sick and tired of being fat! Being a BBW is fine, and I do love myself. I am beautiful, intelligent, strong willed and I have a killer personality but being fat sucks! I cannot do everything that I want to do in life, while I am in this body.

How long will it take?

This time around I put no time limit on my journey. It will take as long as I need it to take. Maybe three years, maybe it will never be over, and that’s OK.

My Goals?

I believe my goals will be ever changing. That is why my journey may never be over. But for now my goals are as follows:

1) Lead a healthy lifestyle.

This includes eating healthier (not any specific diet, I am still going to live my life, but just healthier choices), and getting active. This will help me, and hopefully set a better example for my daughter.

2) Loose 20 pounds.

This is my first actual weight loss goal. Once I reach it I will up the anti but for now…I am half way there!

3) Be under 200 pounds.

My goal weight is 150 pounds but I am not focusing on that just yet. Getting under 200 pounds will be a huge accomplishment as I have not been that weight since I was about 17 years old.

4) Be able to shop in ANY store I want.

This is actually a huge one for me. I have been shopping in plus size stores since I was 17, and paying the plus size price tag as well. I love that there are stores targeted specifically to plus size woman. There are even stores targeted to YOUNG plus size woman. But you know what? Im sick of being confined to a few stores that I can buy clothing at.

I am a young 20 something. I want to be able to walk into any store, try something on, and have it fit! I want to be able to be on trend and be able to go shopping where all of my girlfriends shop instead of dragging them to Addition-elle or Maurice or Penningtons for myself. I want to be able to buy what I want, from wherever I want.

5) Stop saying no to active play with my daughter.

I do this. I know every parent doeswpid-20150226_174802.jpg it at some point or another but I do it so often that my daughter no longer wants to do anything active, even if I suggest it. I feel like a failure in this aspect but that is going to change. We will get outside and do things together and I will no longer say no, or take no for an answer.

Why is this time different than the last?

I am sick of making up excuses as to why I ‘cant’ excersize. I am an able bodied person. It might take me double the time to do the same workout as someone half my size, I may have to modifty every single move for my arthritis and just because I am not up to that specific skill set or speed yet, but thats OK! Thats OK because Im not going to sit on my ass and watch my life go by anymore. I am going to get up and live it.

My Motivation

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Tight and Sore

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Sweaty Selfie #3 after stretching/yoga

Yesterday was day three of my fitness journey and the 3rd day of working out. I am having difficulty describing the degree of soreness that I was feeling. Have you ever seen a very old man hobbling around with a cane or walker? Have you ever noticed how slowly he has to choose his steps or how his legs are a bit bowed? That was me all day. Getting up from a chair or sitting down in a chair was almost excruciating; and climbing or walking down stairs without your legs giving out, IMPOSSIBLE.

Since we were so sore, we decided to go a the T25 Stretch video as our workout for the night and I am so glad that we did. It was 25 minutes of intense stretches for your whole body. There were quick moving, fluid stretches. There were static poses that you had to hold. There were a few times that I could not hold those poses and pretty much fell over because I have no balance what so ever lol.

We were still sweating by the end, showing that we were actually getting a good workout, and our muscles felt pretty great by the end. Our muscles did not feel 100% but they were noticeably looser and did not hurt as much.

I recommend, after doing the stretches to get rid of the tension in your muscles, to take a bath. Epson salt with peppermint essential oils is amazing and helps to relax ailing muscles. I felt amazing after my bath and stretches and went straight to bed.


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Sweaty Selfie #4 after T25 Speed 1.0

T25 Speed 1.0 kicked our butts tonight! My goodness what a workout!

It was crazy. I had to do the modifiers throughout the entire workout but I was still sweating my butt off even halfway through. Actually, this is the most we have sweat for any of the workouts so far.

Truthfully, I didn’t think that I would make it through this workout. I had to stop a few times to catch my breath and grab a quick sip of water. It really keeps you moving through the entire workout. The thing is, I DID make it.  And you know what? I am so proud of myself!

It took me about 20 minutes, even after a cool down and cold shower, to officially catch my breath, but afterwards I felt pretty amazing. I cannot wait to do again!